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Cann River Tarts

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by PickerAUS » Fri Jan 23, 2009 11:37 pm

Well this is a long one...
I joined up with a couple of brothers who basically played covers from the 60's 70's and early 80's. The music was an exact replica of what the local radio station was playing in a small country town in NSW Australia. We could play pretty much anything from old time dances to heavy metal, so we were popular, had a great name (Foreplay or is the Fourplay?) and could play for 4 hrs with no repeats. :)
One day our fame went across the border to this timber milling town with maybe 3 females and 300 men. Not that it was any better than where we came from, which had 10 females and 350 men.
We set up for a 'pub gig' and soon started to play. After the first set, about 30 dolled-up women just turned up. Evidently they were ladies who travelled around the countryside staying in caravan (trailer) parks and they had just arrived. In a few minutes they were all dancing, drinking and laughing. Sure there was a few dance floor fights, but nothing too serious. No chicken wire needed.
Now our band had groupies. The fact that they were all male and travelled across the border to watch us play shouldn't worry you, but they (and everybody else except us) got really drunk. By 12 midnight the hotel had to close doors and so the gig finished.
Part of the deal was the management put us up for the night so we could travel to our next gig about 100 miles further south into 'Mexico' (umm Victoria).
After packing everything up, we went upstairs to our rooms. We were all unwinding on the top balcony overlooking the town which was basically a cross intersection and we noticed half the male population including all of our male groupies, unconscious, passed out all over the road and sidewalks.
We were cacking ourselves laughing...
Minutes later one of them woke up, looked around and realised that all his mates were down, woke all of them up and organised them all to go visit the tarts. That was funny as hell. Imagine a bunch of slow moving ants going in different directions and you'll get what I mean.
Of course they went the wrong way and wound up lost.
They weren't exactly quiet and some upright citizen must of complained. 2 of them wound up near the bus shelter and soon a police patrol cruised by and asked them "What are you doing here?"
A quick-witted, half stoned groupie replied, "We're waiting for the bus!"
To their amazement the police drove off and minutes later a Greyhound bus pulls up for a rest stop!
Everybody piles out of the bus to stretch their legs and the lost group of now exhausted, drunk and rowdy tart-sniffing guys who have realised that they've gone down the wrong road, have turned around, see the bus and start staggering towards it like zombies, dead silent.
The passengers get confused, some get scared, then really frightened and within seconds clamber aboard the bus which just takes off.
Typically, the zombies got themselves re-organised and wander off in a different direction.

By now we're pissing ourselves with laughter. The whole thing took maybe an hour and just unfolded in front of our eyes.
A really memorable gig!
---------------
Updated Link: Pic here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cann_River,_Victoria
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PickerAUS
 
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Joined: Fri Jan 23, 2009 5:06 am
Location: Australia

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